Acabei de assistir um filme chamado "Na Natureza Selvagem".
Um cara que foge de sua própria vida. uma vida cheia de mentiras, uma vida a qual ele não pertence e sai a se aventurar pelo mundo a fora. Seu objetivo final é desbravar as montanhas geladas e inóspitas do Alaska.
Queria ser determinada como ele. Queria ir em busca do meu destino onde quer que ele esteja.
Mas eu continuo aqui, vivendo uma vida de mentiras. Eu sou covarde demais pra dizer sim, covarde demais pra dizer não, então levo a vida dizendo talvez... pode ser... É tão fácil culpar alguém pelos nossos erros e fracassos. eu simplesmente espero que alguém tome decisões por mim. Eu sinto falta de quando a minha irmã escolhia que roupas comprar pra mim. Eu só tinha que vestí-las.
As vezes eu também quero ir em busca do meu próprio "alaska" um lugar onde eu me encontre, um lugar onde eu possa ser eu mesma e possa me sentir leve denovo. Só não quero encontrar lá o mesmo fim trágico de Chris ...
Thursday, July 17, 2008
i just watched a movie called "Into the Wild"
a guy who runs from his life... a life full of lies, a life that he doesnt belong to.
his goal is get to the cold and unhospitable mountains from Alaska.
i wish i were determined like him i'd like to go and find my destiny, wherever it is.
but im still here living a life of lies. im too coward to say yes, im too coward to say no, then i live saying maybe. It's so easy to blame someone for our mistakes... I just wait for someone to take a decision for me cause im not strong enough to take any decision. i miss the time when my sister would go to the shop to choose the clothes to me and i just had to wear it. sometimes i also feel like going to my own Alaska... the place where i will find my manhood. I just don't wannan have the same tragic end that he did...
a guy who runs from his life... a life full of lies, a life that he doesnt belong to.
his goal is get to the cold and unhospitable mountains from Alaska.
i wish i were determined like him i'd like to go and find my destiny, wherever it is.
but im still here living a life of lies. im too coward to say yes, im too coward to say no, then i live saying maybe. It's so easy to blame someone for our mistakes... I just wait for someone to take a decision for me cause im not strong enough to take any decision. i miss the time when my sister would go to the shop to choose the clothes to me and i just had to wear it. sometimes i also feel like going to my own Alaska... the place where i will find my manhood. I just don't wannan have the same tragic end that he did...
Saturday, July 12, 2008
poor blog... so abandoned...
i've been so busy that i havent had time to post anything.
i miss some stuffs being so busy but in another hand, keeping my mind busy keeps me away from thinking abt stuffs that make me upset. :>
anyway life hasnt been that bad. lets say im too dramatic lol
actually... it has been quite good. i have a new family who adopted me as a new member.
they seem to like me so much that i feel awkward sometimes.
anyway today im home. its 1am but i want to enjoy every minute. its so good to be home....
but i guess i cant make it anymore. ill go to bed. ill try to write here some other day. no inspiration for now. my brain is empty.
xxxxxxxxxxx
i've been so busy that i havent had time to post anything.
i miss some stuffs being so busy but in another hand, keeping my mind busy keeps me away from thinking abt stuffs that make me upset. :>
anyway life hasnt been that bad. lets say im too dramatic lol
actually... it has been quite good. i have a new family who adopted me as a new member.
they seem to like me so much that i feel awkward sometimes.
anyway today im home. its 1am but i want to enjoy every minute. its so good to be home....
but i guess i cant make it anymore. ill go to bed. ill try to write here some other day. no inspiration for now. my brain is empty.
xxxxxxxxxxx
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